Now Is The Time

Now is the time to get things done…wade in the water, sit in the sun, squish my toes in the mud by the door, explore the world of a girl just four.

Now is the time to study books, flowers, snails, how a cloud looks; to ponder “up,” where God sleeps nights, why mosquitoes take such big bites.

Later there’ll be time to sew and clean, paint the hall that soft new green, to make new drapes, refinish the floor – Later on…when she’s not just four.”
- Irene Foster

 I read this on a blog I really enjoy. I read then re-read it and thought Ah-ha! This is my struggle right now... this is my predicament. I don't seem to be able to just do the small fun things anymore... if someone asked me "don't you remember what it was like to be a child?" I would say "uh not really". I want so badly for this  season of homeschooling Owen to be joyful and adventuresome. I want to foster joy and a love of learning.  I want to read books and do crafts and bake things for the neighbors. I want to go on long walks and puddle jump. I need to make this time special for him... and for me. Instead I get so caught up in the things that "have to" be done and loose sight of the things that "should be" done.  He is only 4 and he deserves better than I have been giving. He is still a child full of life and curiosity and I have not been able to see it-I have been too focused on the task of educating and I missed the whole point-I see it now and I want to "get things done".

This is my prayer, and if your so inclined I ask that you would pray it for me as well, I hope I can remember it daily.

Father in heaven, Thank you for my lovely family and the beautiful healthy children you have given to me. Please help me to seek your purpose for my every day. Help me to know the things that should be done in this season and to do them joyfully for your glory. Give me wisdom to discern which days should be filled with practical things and which should be used for fun. Help me to understand your plan for this season of our lives and to seek you and and to carry out your will and not my own for this special time in our home. I ask that you would give me a renewed child like joy and that it would be contagious in this house and in our lives. I pray that you would use me however you want and that I would be submissive to your plans for me and for my children.  I pray for these things in the name of your sweet son Jesus.  Amen.
now is the time to get things done

a stream of conscience

I haven't felt the desire to write in a long time. I keep thinking I should really update my blog... but the task seems cumbersome and I cant make myself want to. I want to get back to the place where writing is cathartic and something I feel passion for... I guess I will just start by writing more often and see if those old feelings return.
My life lately has seemed slow moving and hurried all at once. Slow because our lives have been rather metered, rushed because I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.
 I started homeschooling Owen and although  it is not as hard as I thought, it still seems to be a mental challenge to rise to the occasion everyday. I know some of you are probably more than a little surprised that I am homeschooling-and honestly so am I-but it is the right thing for our family in this season of life. Owen loves learning and is disappointed the days we don't do school. I am less passionate about it... still I know it is the best thing for us... so I am muddling through it day by day.
Its funny how my days seems to drag on then fly by. We have a great routine right now... we wake and have a family snuggle up on our bed. Then we eat brecky and tidy up a bit. Then Henry naps while Owen and I do school. We then do whatever the day calls for and the have lunch then rest and then a little more of this or that then dinner, bath, stories, and bed. Some times I think that the day will last forever that the bed time and kissing the boys goodnight is a far away dream. Other days I cant hold on to the sweetness of the the passing minutes to save my life.
Its nice... and yet my heart longs for adventure on a grander scale. I don't know what business my heart has longing for such a thing when we are doing great with  the simple things in life...but there you have it. I find myself dreaming of travel and hiking and open sea sailing-I have never even been on the open seas-I want to sail! Maybe not literally... but I have the yearning that I always get before a big change.
I want to be out there -you know in the world-making a difference... but doing what? For whom? With who's energy? All questions yet unanswered.
Yes I feel a change brewing-something is happening in our lives-and I don't know when but I sure know its a-coming. This season of simplicity is good, its a gift, a rest before the big adventure ahead. I will enjoy the slow pace while it lasts instead of impatiently fidgeting for the end of the day. I will drink in the smell of little heads and blowing bubbles. I will let the sound of my children's perfect laughter fill my soul with joy and I will wait and see what our-certainly interesting-future will hold.